infodatos Chapter 377: Allies for Now
Chapter 377: Allies for Now
Chapter 377: Allies for Now"I was powerless, Alwin.
I didn’t have this mind-reading ability to know the truth everyone was hiding.
I didn’t have memories of a past life that would tell me this and that, or something I could use as my basis for future actions.
I thought I had nothing.
That I had no power of my own.
And I thought my family had betrayed me.
Thus, I never asked for their help and resorted to plotting.
I thought I was all by myself.
And I didn’t know what else to do so I simply maximized what I thought I could use back then," Arabella replied to Alwin’s question.
That made Alwin silent since he actually understood that much.
"I regret cheating on Ferdinand.
And I don’t plan on doing it now, so you don’t have to worry about it.
And you were mistaken in believing I never loved Ferdinand.
I fell in love with him just a few days after the wedding.
And I soon forgot about Andrew and longed for Ferdinand.
I had sleepless nights thinking of how to make him a bit less cold to me.
I craved for his time, love, and affection.
But due to how he behaved, I thought I only got it for a few months.
I didn’t know he loved me too and that he cherished our son as well."
This made Alwin frown.
"You loved His Majesty in the past?
Weren’t you in love with that prince for a long time?"
"You all misunderstood that.
I was young, Alwin.
My heart changed so easily.
I thought I would die without Andrew.
But I soon fell in love with Ferdinand and got over him.
A wound heals through time, but it does more quickly with a cure.
Ferdinand was my cure.
And he was my world in Valeria where I knew no one.
Until Fermin was born, and I thought of focusing on him instead since I believed Ferdinand didn’t care about me at all."
Arabella explained her side this time since Alwin had already explained their side.
"I realized; I wouldn’t have hated Ferdinand that much if I didn’t love him so much.
I hated him to that extent because I had such high hopes and trust in him despite thinking I do not have his heart.
When I thought he was the culprit, I wasn’t simply brokenhearted.
All my hopes were crushed, and my world fell apart.
Even though I thought I had gotten over him, my feelings were still there.
Just hidden.
I still loved him a lot and I thought my feelings only came to bite me in the end.
It made me regret ever loving him.
It made me regret even being born in this world.
I regretted all sorts of things so badly I simply wanted to die.
But I didn’t want to leave without doing anything.
I had to do something or else I would feel like I didn’t cherish Fermin as much as I thought.
I didn’t want to leave while the one I thought was the culprit who killed him was still living like nothing happened.
I didn’t know everything Ferdinand was doing at that time.
I didn’t know anything.
What would you have done if you were the one in my place knowing only about my small little world?"
Arabella couldn’t help getting emotional as she recalled all those painful feelings from the past.
"How would you have acted if the only things you knew were what I knew?
How would you feel if you believed someone so important to you was killed by another person you cherish?
Would you still be able to stay rational and think logically all the time?"
Arabella wanted Alwin to understand what she felt back then with what she thought was the truth.
She ended up explaining more of the things they misunderstood and the things Alwin internally complained about before.
She ended up making Alwin cry since he was actually blaming himself for not being able to prevent what happened in the past.
Arabella felt bad.
She felt like she bullied a child who was not being honest with himself and was just trying to let out his frustrations.
’I should have just listened to him.’
But she also had no one to talk with about her complaints regarding the past since only Alwin knew about it too.
And it felt nice to be able to finally explain the things that were misunderstood by them.
Maybe that was why Alwin was saying his complaints aloud now since he finally had someone, he could speak with about them.
But just when Arabella was feeling bad for Alwin and thought of apologizing, he hit back with more complaints and made her cry too.
They ended up debating for hours and blaming each other’s side for what they could have done to have prevented the tragedy of the past.
Yet, they were both actually blaming themselves for what they could have done but did not do in the past.
In the end, they got tired of talking for so long and finally quieted down when their throats started to hurt since they had been speaking in loud voices.
That was when they realized they felt so much lighter after saying all their complaints and explanations aloud for the first time.
They both realized they felt better after they let out the frustrations that they both once had no one to speak about with.
They drank cups of Ofelia tea to calm their nerves.
Once they both calmed down, they agreed to be allies and help each other prevent the tragedy of the past instead of blaming each other.
"Rest assured, I want to make Ferdinand happy in this life too," Arabella told Alwin.
"As you should," Alwin said but in a more friendly manner this time.
"Yes. I have already fallen in love with him again.
So, you don’t have to worry about me trying to betray him while you are away.
Just go and do what you have to do.
I will behave nicely," Arabella assured him.
With their goals aligned, Arabella and Alwin were allies for now.